OWIE, TRIGGERED // My neck and back have been giving me trouble off and on lately. And now ON for a solid week.
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Yesterday I started to get panicked. It had been going on for long enough that my old chronic illness buttons were pushed, lit up, flashing.
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Today from my bed I had enough gumption to pull a few cards. No right or wrong way. Pulled one from each of the decks I had handy. And in the order they popped up they made perfect sense.
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Letting go. Of finding answers right now. Of worrying. Of needing to do anything other than laying around. Of feeling my family’s readiness for this to be over and for me to be in a different place. Letting go of it all and just being where I am at this moment. In pain.
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Joy. What feels joyful? What can that joy create? Liquids. Coconut water. Tea. Dark chocolate. Ordering lunch in. Movies with my girl and my cat all the way until we pick up big sister.
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It gets better. It will. It always does. It’ll shift. Answers will come. Start with letting go and finding joy. The rest will come
